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Thursday, September 2, 2010

snot balls

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SNIIIIIFFFFFFFF.  SLUURRRRRPPP.  SUUUUCCCCK.  Good grief boy, don't suck.  Blow.  Blow that nose.  Great, gooey, slimy balls of snot shoot from his honker.  yuuuuuucccccccckkkkkkk.  Save me now.

Alex came down with a late summer cold last week.  A nasty one, at that.  I don't know where he got it or how long it will last, but I am pleading with the snot demons that they vacate my house.  now.  no, actually, I wish they had left ten minutes ago.  better yet, ten days ago.

I don't know what it is that Alex doesn't like about blowing his nose.  Is it the slime that extricates itself from the deepest recesses of his head?  Is it that he likes that feeling of great gooby gunkiness, stuck up near his brain?  Does he want to stay sick forever?  Or, does he just like to hear my disgusted reactions to hearing the bubbles of boogers when he sniffs, snorts, and sneezes?

Really, there are no words to express that sound that the snot makes when children suck it back up into their noses.  Why must they do this?  Just let it fly!  Grab a tissue or a snot rag and shoot it on out.  Maybe the moms of the world should make up snot-shooting contests.  Come on up!  See how far you can blow!  Knock over the milk cans for a glorious prize!


  1. mucinex! http://mucinex.com/html/kids If he won't let it out, at least it'll dry him up! Poor guy, and poor momma. The only thing worse than having your own cold is listening to someone deal with all that mucus.

  2. This reminds me of one of my mom's friends. She would do the same thing, these long draws of snot, inhaling everything to the back of her skull, where it collecting, just biding it's time until it could try for another escape.

    As a kid I wondered why she did this, it was disgusting. At least your snot miser is a kid, this woman was full grown. Yuck! LOL

  3. Oh don't forget the picking! That one is always fun. Why can't kids be born with their own instruction manuals? Not for parents for them to read!!!!

  4. @Amanda-- we've been doing the mucinex. He's been through an entire bottle in the last week.

    @Kimberly-- That is even more disgusting. How can a grown woman lack the decorum to blow her nose? ewww.

    @Andrea-- good idea! Someone should write that book. How to Live Life without Annoying your Poor Parents

  5. This is funny but only becauce I've been there.

    Thanks for stopping by my blog. I'm your newest follower.


  6. It took my son 9 years to learn how to truly blow his nose! Much luck to ya!!

    We are your newest followers! Hope you will come visit us at www.justmarriedwithcoupons.com

    Happy Friday!

  7. oh no, and here I thought the mucinex would save you. I don't think I discovered it until I was 26. And what a blessed discovery it was! I hope he gets better!

  8. That can be frustrating. I hate when my children are ill with a cold. I hope that you find a solution that works. Visiting from the blog frog. http://CleverlyChanging.com

  9. Thanks, Elle, for the compassion and the visit. Alex is getting better, sorta, but now I'm sick with the same gunk! These germies need to vanish, stat!


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